Maxwell Edison, majoring in medicine.
Calls her on the phone.
Can I take you out to the pictures.
Joa, oa, oa, oan?
But as she’s getting ready to go.
A knock comes on the door.
Bang! Bang! Maxwell’s silver hammer.
Came down upon her head.
Clang! Clang! Maxwell’s silver hammer.
Made sure that she was dead.
Maxwell’s Silver Hammer
The Beatles (1969), Abbey Road
The reason for writing this blog is not to purposely bash Facebook (okay, a little bit). I don’t resent the success of the social media platform. I even loved that David Fincher movie from 2010 (The Social Network), although I don’t think Zuckerberg and his palls liked it so much. And talking about Zuckerberg, I have nothing against him. I admire him even. However, I just feel and believe that Facebook is not so good for people. Here’s why:
1. People chat about horseshit
If you read the average Facebook page, how many substantial posts can you find? I think your IQ drops 5 points with every visit. If this is a representation of mankind, than I arrogantly feel a bit like Albert Einstein in WWII who wrote; ‘I often wonder: what idiotic race am I part of?’
2. It makes people socially lazy
Okay, so Facebook reminds you of birthdays of friends of family members, great. But rather than calling them up, sending them a card or buying them a present, people congratulate their friends and family members ON bloody Facebook. That is the laziest social gesture ever. Yes, I heard the argument; ‘but if it makes your life easier, why not make use of it?’ The answer is easy: Because before there was Facebook you didn’t congratulate them either. You completely forgot their birthdays! So are they supposed to be happy to receive a message from you? Off course not. If the effort is zero, it doesn’t mean jack shit.
3. It shows that a lot of people are just selfish jerks
A while ago, I was checking out profiles of old colleagues (that’s one thing Facebook is good for, spying), and I found one who recently lost her daughter in the final stages of her pregnancy. She posted a picture of herself on which she looked very sad. She also posted a card with the baby’s name on it and the date of birth and death (it was the same day).
How many people responded to this message? Perhaps 8. And I am not even talking about the most supportive comments either. One person said; ‘if you ever need help, you know where to find me.’ Jerk. How often do you see the most lame ass shit on the web get a hundred likes or more? All the fucking time. But when people post something that really comes from the heart, that shows what life is all about, most people couldn’t give a shit.
4. It makes idiotic suggestions on who to connect with
Just because I checked out some profile doesn’t mean I want to befriend somebody! Please stop with these ridiculous suggestions, FB. You are terrible at it, so you might as well stop before you annoy me away. Also, it makes your mailbox explode. FB, if you have to make awful suggestions on who to befriend, at least only do it once. I don’t want multiple suggestions on one day, and especially not the same lame ass suggestions more than once. And while I am at it, don’t mail me about the idiotic updates my friends posted.
5. The past is the past
Facebook makes you connect with people from your past. Or at least confronts you with their ugly faces on a daily basis. There are reasons you don’t see them anymore, and in 99% of the cases it is absolutely fine if it stays that way. It is bad for your mental health to keep stirring up people and events from the past for who you have no place in your current life and mind.
So why keep Facebook? Yes indeed. Why? It takes a chunk of your valuable time, makes you anxious, and hardly offers anything in return. Not even talking yet about the privacy violations. There must surely be better ways to stay in touch with your friends.
I saw you walk down the street.
With some other girl, yeah.
Always thought that I was the only one in your world.
Baby can you tell me so.
Out of sight out of mind ain’t what love ought to be, yeah.
And I hoped all the time that you’d be faithful to me.
you be faithful to me.
Be My baby
Vanessa Paradis (1992), Vanessa Paradis
Rovio, the makers of the Angry Birds series recently presented me with an offer I couldn’t refuse. Their new game ‘Stella Pop’ is a mixture between Angry Birds and Puzzle Bobble. I was addicted to the later in my days as a dope smoking punk. Every day in the coffeeshop playing Puzzle Bubble with a spliff between my teeth was a good day.
I was a little suspicious that I could download it for free, because free doesn’t exist for a listed company like Rovio. For Angry Birds and the likes, I always had to pay about 0,99 eurocents, and than I could play it unlimited. So free didn’t feel quite right.
I started playing and it was a great addictive experience. After three levels off shooting bubbles however, I was informed that I was out of bubbles and had to buy gold to get more. The pricelist looked as follows:
– 10 gold pieces €0,99
– 50 gold pieces €2,99
– 105 gold pieces €6,99
– 250 gold pieces €13,99
– 650 gold pieces €34,99 (best value)
Are you for real, Rovio? How long will I last with 35 euro’s worth of gold? And what if I want to continue playing after that, do I have to spend another 35 bucks? Technically I could spend 700 bucks on playing this single game if only I would play it endlessly. That is 10 times more expensive that the most expensive game I can get at Amazon.com.
You see, I don’t like this kind of revenue model. I want to spend money only once and then play the game to death. In my coffeeshop days, I would keep throwing in coins also, but that was also rent for the use of the arcade hardware. In the digital age we now live, that is no longer necessary because everybody can afford the hardware themselves. So all the game producers have to provide is the pixels, and let’s be frank Rovio, the marginal costs for a million additional bubbles are about 0000000,1 cent, so you really can’t justify these kind of prices. I understand you need to make a living, but then charge us more for the initial purchase, let’s say €4,99, and then I am one customer who’s willing to buy.
With the current offer I am not. I then rather play the original version online FOR FREE. No strings attached.
FRAGMENTEN UIT HET SCHEMERLAND 